The Classic Monsters' Screenplay: Making Horror Scary Again

0:11 Speaker 1: Hey guys, this is Crimson.

0:13 Speaker 2: And this is Swan. And we'd love to know what you think of the stories.

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0:22 Speaker 4: It lies in.

0:29 Speaker 5: Wait.

0:32 Speaker 4: Amidst your dreams, where nothing is ever how it seems. It is a portal to a terrifying world beyond the doorway to nightmare. Nightmare. Welcome. I'm your host, Artemis Black.

1:10 Speaker 4: The very first Frankenstein movie was made by the Edison Studio in 1910. Nosferatu, the first Dracula movie, was made in Germany in 1922, and the first werewolf movie, 1913. At the time of their release, audiences screamed with terror. So sad that no one is afraid of monsters anymore.

1:43 Speaker 6: It is intolerable. I am nothing more than a morning cereal.

1:51 Speaker 7: But, Master.

1:52 Speaker 3: You are the Prince of Darkness. You are the ruler of the underworld.

1:57 Speaker 6: And now everyone oddly laughs at me, laughs at me. I have been maligned for far too long. It is time for the public to be truly scared.

2:14 Speaker 4: Our mystery drama, No One is Afraid of Monsters Anymore, was adapted from the short story and written especially for Doorways to Nightmare by Winslow Swan and edited by Crimson McKenzie. Our stars include Mick Davis, Jonathan Rosignol, William Stafford, Annie Mick, and Will Dorman. I'll be back shortly with Act One.

2:39 Speaker 2: If you're enjoying these stories, come over to our YouTube channel.

2:43 Speaker 3: Doorway to Nightmare.

2:47 Speaker 1: Where we add a few pics to color your imagination. See the faces behind the voices, too. Come on, you know you wanna.

2:54 Speaker 8: Doorway to.

3:11 Speaker 4: Nightmare Joel Cohen once said that we create monsters, and then we cannot control them. Of course, now we're no longer frightened by the classic monsters that came from the minds of Mary Shelley or Bram Stoker. Or are we?

3:44 Speaker 3: Oh!

3:45 Speaker 5: These bones do ache sometimes. I wonder what people would think if they knew that the Prince of Darkness sleeps in the nude.

3:58 Speaker 9: Igor!

3:59 Speaker 4: Igor!

4:00 Speaker 9: Where are you?

4:01 Speaker 8: I'm here.

4:02 Speaker 3: Master, I have your libation.

4:07 Speaker 9: Oh, positive again.

4:09 Speaker 3: I'm afraid that is all that we have installed.

4:13 Speaker 5: How I recall the nights when I could find a virgin within a few minutes.

4:18 Speaker 3: I'm beginning to think that they are only mythical creatures. Yes.

4:25 Speaker 9: Now is everyone gathered in the main ballroom?

4:28 Speaker 3: Yes, master. All the creatures of the night await your presence.

4:32 Speaker 6: What a dismal time it is, Igor. But, as the master of darkness, I must inform all.

4:40 Speaker 3: Rumors have been flying around the belfry.

4:43 Speaker 7: I know.

4:45 Speaker 9: I shall address them all tonight.

4:48 Speaker 10: Could I.

5:00 Speaker 9: Please have a little quiet?

5:06 Speaker 6: Thank you all for coming to the castle. I understand how hard it is to travel these days. I appreciate the effort from everyone. Igor, I believe your pet is calling for you.

5:26 Speaker 3: It is feeding time, Master.

5:34 Speaker 8: In secret!

5:35 Speaker 6: Before it blows the entire castle down!

5:39 Speaker 9: Why did I allow you to bring Godzilla home?

5:43 Speaker 3: I told you, he followed me home. How could I turn him out into the cold?

5:48 Speaker 6: If he keeps that up, we will not have a place to stay in.

6:00 Speaker 11: Yes, master.

6:01 Speaker 9: Well, what are you standing around for? Go and feed your pet.

6:05 Speaker 3: Yes, master. Right away.

6:13 Speaker 9: Well, well, spit it out already. Apologies.

6:18 Speaker 7: I had a bit of shrimp stuck in my throat. Why are we all here, Count?

6:26 Speaker 6: I have some very sad news for all of us, Legion.

6:30 Speaker 9: It seems that no one is afraid of monsters anymore.

6:34 Speaker 7: Of course not. Look what they have done to us. We're now simply throwbacks in an ancient time.

6:41 Speaker 4: Yes, I know.

6:43 Speaker 6: The movie-going audience have become... How shall I put this nicely?

6:50 Speaker 6: Let us just say that it doesn't take much to scare them.

6:54 Speaker 7: Shake a camera around the woods for 90 minutes and people scream. How is that scary?

7:02 Speaker 6: And do not forget that each one that is made comes with a built-in sequel after sequel after sequel.

7:13 Speaker 6: Oh, I will not allow us to simply vanish from the celluloid history books.

7:18 Speaker 4: Do you have a plan?

7:20 Speaker 9: When have I ever not had a plan?

7:23 Speaker 7: There was that one time in Belgrade when the daughter of.

7:28 Speaker 6: You promised that you would never mention that again.

7:31 Speaker 4: Sorry.

7:31 Speaker 7: So what is this plan of yours?

7:34 Speaker 6: Something that I have been working on for the past few months.

7:39 Speaker 9: Something.

7:40 Speaker 12: That will be so frightening, so terrifying, that people would be afraid of the dark once again.

7:55 Speaker 13: Robert, did you get those contracts sent off?

7:58 Speaker 11: Oh, yes, ma'am. And I have you scheduled for a meeting at Universal next week. Also, your yoga instructor calls. Seems that she is sick with the flu.

8:08 Speaker 13: So much for holistic medicine.

8:10 Speaker 11: I stick to vitamins mostly.

8:12 Speaker 8: I know.

8:13 Speaker 13: You never get sick.

8:15 Speaker 11: If I got sick, this place would collapse. And you, dear Teresa Smithy, would be a basket case.

8:22 Speaker 13: I don't know what I would do without you.

8:26 Speaker 11: Oh, and by the way, this came yesterday.

8:28 Speaker 13: What the hell is this?

8:30 Speaker 11: It's a movie script. Unsolicited, by the way.

8:33 Speaker 13: Please, for all that is holy, you took it home last night and read it?

8:38 Speaker 11: Oh, that is a no-brainer. I had to. You should have seen the postage on it, and you will never guess where it came from.

8:45 Speaker 13: Transylvania?

8:47 Speaker 11: Well, how did you know?

8:48 Speaker 13: You mean it really did come from there?

8:51 Speaker 11: I'm not making this up. Would you believe that the return address was... Castle Dracula?

8:57 Speaker 13: Oh, you have got to be kidding.

9:00 Speaker 11: Anyway... I went ahead and read it.

9:02 Speaker 13: And what did you think?

9:03 Speaker 11: I think that if you don't produce this and get it out there, and someone else does, you're going to be kicking yourself for the next 20 years.

9:12 Speaker 13: That scary?

9:13 Speaker 11: See these bags under my eyes? They ain't luggage, sweetie.

9:17 Speaker 13: Good enough for me. Give our future screenwriter a call and set up a meeting.

9:24 Speaker 11: There's a slight problem there, boss.

9:26 Speaker 13: Oh, wait. Let me guess. No phone.

9:29 Speaker 11: This guy must think very highly of his script. And you. He included a round-trip ticket in first class so you can meet with him in person.

9:39 Speaker 13: I can't just drop everything and go meet up with every Tom, Dick, and Dracula.

9:45 Speaker 11: You leave at 8 a.m. I have already arranged for a limo to pick you up at 5 so that you will have plenty of time.

9:51 Speaker 13: What would I do without you, Robert?

9:54 Speaker 11: Let's hope we don't have to find out. Besides, if this thing is a hit like I think it will be, I expect a huge.

10:00 Speaker 4: bonus. I find it rather strange how the movie industry works. A film that costs very little money to make will have a tremendous success. And then there are these so-called blockbusters that flop and are never heard from again. Perhaps Teresa has found a gem. Let's find out when I return shortly with Act 2.

10:34 Speaker 1: Hi, it's Crimson. We're hoping you're enjoying these stories and do you want to hear some more? Join us on our YouTube channel, Doorway to Nightmare, if you dare.

10:57 Speaker 4: Teresa Smithy, a Hollywood movie producer who received a script from, of all places, Transylvania. She is currently calling her secretary, Robert, from her hotel room.

11:13 Speaker 11: So what's it like?

11:16 Speaker 13: Like any other tourist trap. I swear, if one more person uses that stupid voice to welcome me to Transylvania, ha ha ha, and points me toward the Dracula Museum, I may plant myself face first into the nearest cactus.

11:36 Speaker 11: Do they even have those in Transylvania?

11:39 Speaker 13: I don't know.

11:42 Speaker 11: It can't be all bad, can it?

11:44 Speaker 13: I arrived at six last night, hoping to get a bite to eat.

11:48 Speaker 3: Ha ha.

11:49 Speaker 13: The kitchen was closed.

11:51 Speaker 7: Closed!

11:52 Speaker 13: Can you believe that? And then they handed me a key to my room. An actual metal key with a lock to put it in. When I told them I had a meeting up there this evening, they said nobody goes up there anymore. Too dangerous. Like a wall could collapse on top of you. There was a note waiting for me. Get this. A carriage will pick you up tonight at 8 for our meeting. Looking forward to a mutually beneficial discussion. Signed, The Count.

12:26 Speaker 11: Well, whoever this is, they are really going all out for you.

12:40 Speaker 13: Well, isn't this pleasant? Guess I'll just knock on the... Should have seen that one coming.

12:52 Speaker 3: Hello?

12:53 Speaker 13: I'm Teresa Smithy. Anyone here? Big surprise there.

13:02 Speaker 8: Hello?

13:05 Speaker 6: Hello?

13:05 Speaker 9: I bid you welcome. Please, come quickly. Go safely and leave a little of the happiness that you bring.

13:23 Speaker 13: That is by far the best Dracula that I have ever seen in my life. I got to hand it to you. You have even got that huge medallion around your neck. What a performance. I'm sure the tourists eat it up.

13:43 Speaker 9: Perhaps you would like some wine?

13:47 Speaker 13: Oh, yes, please.

13:53 Speaker 9: To a most profitable endeavor.

13:57 Speaker 13: Oh, this is quite good. Aren't you having any?

14:00 Speaker 9: I never drink.

14:02 Speaker 4: Why?

14:03 Speaker 9: Come, please follow me to the ballroom. Ah, listen to them. The children of the night.

14:17 Speaker 13: What music they make. Yes, I've seen the movie. But let's get down to business. You have a great monster for this movie. And I don't think that our special effects department will have any problem building it.

14:33 Speaker 9: Did you say building it?

14:35 Speaker 4: Well.

14:36 Speaker 13: There may have to be some changes made in the description as well as a few minor rewrites.

14:42 Speaker 9: Rewrites?

14:43 Speaker 13: Hey, just calm down, big guy. Every movie is made three times. Once in your head, once on film, and finally in the editing room. That's where the real movie is made.

14:57 Speaker 9: I did not realize.

15:00 Speaker 13: You just let me worry about all that. I think you have a great shooting script now. There is the matter of your monster that you described.

15:11 Speaker 9: What is wrong with it?

15:13 Speaker 13: I'm just not sure how well it will play on the screen. You've described some effects that no one has ever done before.

15:21 Speaker 4: Effects?

15:22 Speaker 13: Ah, don't worry, kid. It will all.

15:30 Speaker 13: What the hell was that?

15:34 Speaker 6: It's just Igor's pet feeding time again.

15:37 Speaker 13: Um, exactly what does it eat?

15:41 Speaker 5: You have nothing to fear. I told everyone that you are strictly off-limits.

15:47 Speaker 9: They will listen to me.

15:49 Speaker 13: Oh, of course. You are the Prince of Darkness, after all.

15:54 Speaker 9: You must understand, Miss Smithy.

15:57 Speaker 5: I have poured my very being into this movie.

16:01 Speaker 9: I have left nothing out. That was not completely mine. Would you care to see the actual monster?

16:14 Speaker 4: British author Glenn Duncan once said, monsters die out when the collective imagination no longer needs them. Our count would like to change that. I'll be back shortly with Act.

16:32 Speaker 2: Three If you're enjoying these stories, come over to our YouTube channel, Doorway to.

16:40 Speaker 1: Nightmare, where we add a few pics to color your imagination. See the faces behind the voices, too. Come on, you know you wanna.

17:03 Speaker 4: It has been a little over a year since Dracula's movie script went into production. Tonight is the big opening premiere, complete with the press, fans, red carpet, and, of course, Dracula and the monster of Victor Frankenstein who calls himself Legion.

17:28 Speaker 7: What is the matter?

17:31 Speaker 9: Look at them all.

17:32 Speaker 14: Are any of them running and screaming at the very sight of me?

17:36 Speaker 3: No.

17:37 Speaker 9: All they want is a picture.

17:39 Speaker 7: Until they find out you cannot be photographed.

17:42 Speaker 6: The digital world may have changed that.

17:45 Speaker 7: Personally, I love the attention.

17:48 Speaker 6: Of course you could not. You were a sympathetic monster.

17:52 Speaker 9: I was evil incarnate.

17:56 Speaker 4: Why are you so angry all the time?

18:00 Speaker 7: You have an entire village that celebrates you every year. Now, look at all of these people coming to see something that you have created.

18:10 Speaker 4: So?

18:11 Speaker 13: So?

18:11 Speaker 3: So?

18:12 Speaker 13: What do you think?

18:14 Speaker 8: Isn't this great?

18:15 Speaker 9: Let's just wait and see.

18:17 Speaker 13: What do you mean, wait and see? The reviews have been great. I'm telling you, we have a definite hit on our hands.

18:26 Speaker 14: I want to see firsthand the frightened looks of the people hurrying home to lock their doors and windows and to crawl under their beds, fearful that the monster, the fiend, will be able to still get them.

18:43 Speaker 13: Um, Legion, that is your name, correct?

18:46 Speaker 4: Yes, it is, Miss Smithy.

18:49 Speaker 13: What the heck is he talking about?

18:51 Speaker 7: I have learned to only listen. And try not to comprehend.

18:57 Speaker 6: You fools!

18:58 Speaker 7: Both of you!

19:00 Speaker 14: Do you not know that the monster, my monster, is at this.

19:05 Speaker 6: Very moment within the walls of this theater?

19:08 Speaker 13: What the hell did you do to my premiere?

19:11 Speaker 9: The monster of all monsters.

19:15 Speaker 6: The king of monsters is lurking, creeping in the darkness. waiting for just the right moment.

19:23 Speaker 13: You idiot. You hired some actor to jump out at the crowd? That kind of stuff went out in the 60s.

19:35 Speaker 8: Ah-ah.

19:36 Speaker 1: There.

19:37 Speaker 5: The screams to my ears are like music.

19:43 Speaker 9: What is that? What is that? they are not screaming they are not running.

19:53 Speaker 13: I did what you told me to do.

19:59 Speaker 3: I screamed, I threatened, I growled.

20:04 Speaker 2: I thought that I had done everything correctly.

20:11 Speaker 3: What happened?

20:12 Speaker 4: Oh, at first, they jumped.

20:15 Speaker 2: Then, then, they all laughed at me.

20:20 Speaker 7: And then they applauded. I'm sorry, Draco. Perhaps our time has come and gone.

20:30 Speaker 5: I should grab the first person that walks by and tear out their throat.

20:37 Speaker 13: Hey, guys, we are definitely a hit. Hey, what's wrong? You look like you just lost the lottery by one number.

20:48 Speaker 9: You would not understand.

20:50 Speaker 13: No, you don't understand. See that small group over there? They were the ones who put the money up for this. They were floored by it. We are talking a three-picture deal right now.

21:04 Speaker 7: Wait, did you say three pictures?

21:09 Speaker 13: Best of all, they want you to continue playing the monster, whoever you are.

21:16 Speaker 8: Me?

21:17 Speaker 7: A movie star?

21:19 Speaker 13: You will rank right up there with Jason, Michael, Freddy, Jigsaw, all the biggies.

21:26 Speaker 6: I noticed that I was not listed in that group.

21:30 Speaker 13: Hey, come on. It's time to celebrate.

21:33 Speaker 9: Come on, Legion. Perhaps we should go back to the shadows.

21:38 Speaker 13: Are you kidding? We need you and Legion. I mean, somebody has to write the scripts, don't they? Now let's talk contracts.

21:51 Speaker 4: While Dracula was not amused that no one was afraid of him anymore, he was not going to pass up the chance to make a lot of money. He was told about a dark web where, for the right amount, you could actually buy virgin blood. I'll be back shortly with a final word.

22:19 Speaker 2: You can find more episodes available at youtube.com slash see slash doorway to nightmare. Join us and see where your imagination will take you.

22:39 Speaker 4: I believe that the poet Nikita Gill sums it all up best. The monsters were never under my bed. Because the monsters were inside my head. I fear no monsters, for no monsters I see. Because all this time, the monster has been me. Our cast included Mick Davis, Jonathan Rosignol, William Stafford, Annie Mick, and Will Dorman. The story was edited by Crimson McKenzie and the production was under the direction of Winslow Swan. And now, a preview of our next tale.

23:26 Speaker 1: Dean, why do you have to be so mean to my child?

23:30 Speaker 2: No, she has to learn that there are rules in this house.

23:34 Speaker 8: I know, but.

23:35 Speaker 2: And when the rules are broken, there are consequences.

23:40 Speaker 1: Charity was just playing. There's nothing wrong with a child playing with a doll.

23:44 Speaker 4: Oh, no?

23:46 Speaker 2: Even if that very same doll is saying that it hates us?

23:52 Speaker 4: This is your host, inviting you to return with us through the doorway to nightmare for another adventure into the world of your terrifying imagination. Until next time, slumber peacefully. Epilogue. The butler did it.