Suburban Hauntings and Workplace Secrets: A Funny Ghost Story "Haunting Meets The Carsons"

0:00 Speaker 1: You can find more episodes available at youtube.com slash see slash doorway to nightmare. Join us and see where your imagination will take you.

0:16 Speaker 2: Within your dreams, there are many keys. One of them could open the doorway to nightmare.

0:29 Speaker 3: Nightmare.

0:42 Speaker 2: Come in. Welcome. I'm your host through the doorway to nightmare. Algernon Blackwood once said that it is, alas, chiefly the evil emotions that are able to leave their photographs on surrounding scenes and objects.

1:09 Speaker 4: Are you absolutely sure? that you were home, Fred.

1:14 Speaker 3: Oh, I swear. I haven't left the house. I promise.

1:19 Speaker 4: OK, so if you are home, what is that dark shape in the corner?

1:27 Speaker 3: Dorothy, are you OK?

1:36 Speaker 4: Fred, I think the Carsons have a very serious problem.

1:44 Speaker 2: Our mystery drama, Haunting Meets the Carsons, was written especially for Doorway to Nightmare by Crimson McKenzie and Winslow Swan. Our cast includes William Stafford, Annie Mick, Dave Arkabov, Mick Davis, Crimson McKenzie, and Winslow Swan. It is sponsored in part by Swanage Press. I'll be back shortly with Act One.

2:12 Speaker 4: Hi, it's Crimson! We're hoping you're enjoying these stories, and do you want to hear some more? Join us on our YouTube channel, Doorway to Nightmare, if you dare.

2:37 Speaker 2: If you are a regular listener to these plays, you will undoubtedly know about our resident ghost, Frederick Washington Davis. It has been quite an adventure for him and his hosts, Stan and Dorothy Peters. They have managed to get around most of the difficulties of having a permanent ghost in their home.

3:07 Speaker 5: Maybe we can all eat in peace tonight.

3:11 Speaker 4: Unless one of Millie's ghosts appears.

3:14 Speaker 5: That's not funny, Dot.

3:16 Speaker 4: Oh, Stan.

3:17 Speaker 3: It's okay.

3:18 Speaker 4: Fred swore he would stay at home while we had dinner with the Carsons.

3:22 Speaker 5: He swore he would stay home while we took a vacation. Look how that turned out.

3:28 Speaker 4: Now, Stan. It was his first time home alone and he got a little scared. It wasn't his fault. Let's just try and enjoy ourselves tonight. Besides, being invited by the boss to dinner is quite an honor. I'm proud of you.

3:45 Speaker 5: Well, it is Labor Day. I guess they decided to have a party.

4:00 Speaker 6: So glad you could make it. Please come in.

4:05 Speaker 4: Mmm, something smells good.

4:07 Speaker 7: Oh, it's nothing special, just a pot roast.

4:10 Speaker 4: Well, it still smells delicious.

4:12 Speaker 7: Thank you.

4:13 Speaker 6: Would you two like something to drink?

4:15 Speaker 5: Thank you, Mr. Carson.

4:17 Speaker 6: Now, Stan, I've told you before, it's just plain old Jack since you made partner.

4:23 Speaker 5: Sorry, uh, Jack, I'm still getting used to the idea.

4:27 Speaker 4: Ooh, a very nice wine, Jack.

4:32 Speaker 7: Jack prides himself on his wine, don't you, dear?

4:35 Speaker 6: Glad you like it, Dorothy. Now, Stan, about that new contract.

4:40 Speaker 7: Now, Jack, no shop talk tonight. Remember your promise?

4:45 Speaker 6: Yes, I remember. You don't forget your promise.

4:49 Speaker 7: Don't worry. No ghost tonight.

4:52 Speaker 4: Amen to that. Oh, Millie? Would you mind if I use your bathroom? Of course, dear.

4:58 Speaker 7: It's just down the hall to the left.

5:00 Speaker 4: I just need to wash up a bit. I'll be back in just a minute.

5:03 Speaker 6: I'll freshen your drink.

5:15 Speaker 4: Hey! What happened to the light? That's better. What the... What is going on? Jack, I think you may have a problem with the light in your bathroom.

5:46 Speaker 6: Oh, yes. I've been meaning to fix that.

5:49 Speaker 7: Jack!

5:50 Speaker 6: Not now, Millie.

5:51 Speaker 5: What's going on, Dot?

5:53 Speaker 4: I think we may have an extra guest.

5:55 Speaker 3: What?

5:55 Speaker 5: You don't mean.

5:56 Speaker 4: Will you excuse me? I need to make a phone call.

5:59 Speaker 6: Nothing serious, Sahil.

6:01 Speaker 3: Oh, no.

6:02 Speaker 4: Just want to... Something I forgot to do before coming here. I'll be right back.

6:18 Speaker 3: Um, hello? Hello? Can you hear me? Hello? I think I pressed... Fred, it's me. Oh, hi, Mrs. Peters. I wasn't sure if I was working this thing right.

6:33 Speaker 4: Never mind that. Are you at home?

6:36 Speaker 3: I don't understand the question.

6:38 Speaker 4: It's a very simple yes or no question. Are you home?

6:43 Speaker 3: Well, that depends on what you mean by home.

6:48 Speaker 4: Are you at our house or not?

6:51 Speaker 3: Oh, you mean home, home. Oh, sure, I'm here.

6:55 Speaker 4: Are you positive?

6:57 Speaker 3: Of course I'm positive. I may be a ghost, but I know where I am at.

7:02 Speaker 4: Then show me.

7:02 Speaker 3: I don't understand the question.

7:05 Speaker 4: It's not a question. Show me that you are home.

7:09 Speaker 3: But how do I.

7:10 Speaker 4: Just hit the button that has the little camera on it.

7:13 Speaker 3: But you told me.

7:14 Speaker 4: I know what I told you.

7:16 Speaker 3: Look, Fred....

7:19 Speaker 4: I know that you're not used to cell phone.

7:22 Speaker 3: And you told me never to answer it unless it was you or Stan.

7:26 Speaker 4: Yes, you did a good job. Now I'm telling you to forget all of that. Just hit the video button.

7:34 Speaker 3: Um, where is it?

7:36 Speaker 4: It's the bottom one. On the left side, right at the bottom. It looks like a tiny camera.

7:42 Speaker 3: Uh, is this it?

7:47 Speaker 4: No, not that one. The other one. That's the music player.

7:51 Speaker 3: Wow. Oh, this thing plays music, too.

7:55 Speaker 4: Fred, will you focus? Now press the video button.

7:59 Speaker 3: Oh, I'm sorry. Is this it?

8:02 Speaker 4: Yes, yes.

8:03 Speaker 3: How did you get in that tiny little box? Are you okay?

8:08 Speaker 4: I'm fine, Fred. We'll talk about it later. So you can see me okay?

8:13 Speaker 3: Yes, yes. I can see you. This is awesome.

8:18 Speaker 4: Yes, very awesome.

8:20 Speaker 3: So, how was dinner?

8:21 Speaker 4: We haven't eaten yet.

8:23 Speaker 3: Is Millie still seeing ghosts?

8:25 Speaker 4: Fred, I need you to.

8:28 Speaker 3: I know she sort of saw me last Christmas, but.

8:31 Speaker 4: Fred, will you shut up?

8:33 Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Mrs. Peters.

8:35 Speaker 4: It's okay. I'm sorry for saying shut up. What I want you to do is turn the phone around... And show me exactly where you are in the house.

8:47 Speaker 3: Um, you mean like this? Yes!

8:50 Speaker 4: Good job. Okay, just go a little slower.

8:54 Speaker 3: Well, I'm just in the kitchen.

8:56 Speaker 4: I see that. And you swear that you have not been out of the house.

9:00 Speaker 3: Dorothy, what's going on over there?

9:05 Speaker 4: Oh, I'm beginning to think that Millie isn't crazy after all.

9:14 Speaker 2: We ask only to be reassured about the noises in the cellar and the window that should not have been opened, wrote T.S. Eliot. But what of the other manifestations that occur? The sudden cold. The moaning. And in Dorothy's case, a light that goes on and off. We shall find out in Act 2.

9:42 Speaker 4: Mystery. Horror. Thriller.

9:46 Speaker 8: Suspense.

9:48 Speaker 4: Novels and short story collections from Winslow Swan, now available from Amazon.com.

10:09 Speaker 2: Dorothy and Stan Peters had been invited to his employer's home for a dinner party. Dorothy has had an unpleasant encounter and is now on the phone with her resident ghost, Fred.

10:26 Speaker 7: Everything alright?

10:27 Speaker 4: Oh, yes, Millie. Everything is fine.

10:31 Speaker 5: Are you sure?

10:32 Speaker 3: No.

10:33 Speaker 4: Yes, Stan. Now that dinner does smell wonderful.

10:37 Speaker 6: Let's go to the dining room.

10:39 Speaker 5: That It was delicious, Mrs. Carson.

10:48 Speaker 7: Thank you, Stan.

10:49 Speaker 6: A little more wine, Dorothy?

10:50 Speaker 4: Oh, I think that would be lovely.

10:58 Speaker 5: What was that?

10:59 Speaker 7: Jack, it's starting again.

11:01 Speaker 6: Millie, I warned you.

11:02 Speaker 4: How long has that been going on?

11:12 Speaker 7: A long time now.

11:17 Speaker 5: Dot, what's that over there in the corner?

11:22 Speaker 6: It's just Millie and her overactive imagination again.

11:30 Speaker 7: Does that sound like my imagination?

11:40 Speaker 6: I'm sorry, honey.

11:41 Speaker 7: It's okay.

11:42 Speaker 6: I just thought it was too many three martini lunches and nightgowns.

11:46 Speaker 7: If you saw and heard that all the time, you would be drinking as well.

11:51 Speaker 4: Agreed. But how long has this been going on, Millie?

11:57 Speaker 7: Since last year.

11:58 Speaker 5: So, Dot, you really think there is a ghost? Or is it a mutual friend?

12:04 Speaker 4: No, it's not Fred.

12:05 Speaker 6: Who's Fred?

12:07 Speaker 5: Just a friend? Sort of?

12:10 Speaker 4: I mean, is this the first time that you have heard and seen it, Jack?

12:15 Speaker 6: Well, there have been times when I've heard some strange sounds. I just thought it was the house settling.

12:20 Speaker 7: But this is the first time that we have actually seen something. Oh, Jack, what are we going to do?

12:27 Speaker 4: I think I may know someone who just might be able to help.

12:35 Speaker 3: So she really is seeing something. Yes.

12:40 Speaker 4: She said this was the first time, but I don't think so.

12:43 Speaker 3: Did you see it?

12:45 Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.

12:46 Speaker 3: What did it look like? Scary, Fred.

12:49 Speaker 4: Very scary. Like a dark mass with these small beady eyes that were glowing red.

12:56 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's not good.

12:59 Speaker 4: So what do you suggest?

13:00 Speaker 7: Moving.

13:01 Speaker 3: As far away as possible. Okay.

13:05 Speaker 4: Come on, Fred.

13:06 Speaker 3: Well, then what do you suggest?

13:08 Speaker 4: Can't you come over here and do, well, I don't know, something?

13:12 Speaker 3: If it's what I think it is, then nothing I do will scare it off.

13:17 Speaker 4: Can't you at least try?

13:19 Speaker 3: Okay, hang on.

13:24 Speaker 4: Fred? Are you still there?

13:26 Speaker 3: Fred? Yes?

13:31 Speaker 4: Geez, Fred, will you stop doing that? Or at least tell me when you're going to. I'm already scared to death over here.

13:39 Speaker 3: Oh, sorry, Dot.

13:43 Speaker 5: Okay.

13:44 Speaker 4: Let's go in and let you formally meet the Carsons.

13:54 Speaker 5: Dorothy, are you sure that this.

13:57 Speaker 4: Is a good idea? Of course not. But it's the only one I have.

14:01 Speaker 7: So who is this, Dorothy?

14:03 Speaker 3: Dorothy?

14:04 Speaker 4: Well, that is kind of hard to explain.

14:08 Speaker 6: Why does he look so... so... Jack?

14:12 Speaker 3: Millie?

14:13 Speaker 5: Meet Frederick Washington Davis. Um, our resident ghost.

14:19 Speaker 7: I knew it! I knew they had a ghost, Jack!

14:23 Speaker 6: Okay, okay, I said I was sorry.

14:26 Speaker 3: It was quite a Christmas party last year.

14:30 Speaker 7: It was you!

14:32 Speaker 3: And you are a most remarkable dancer.

14:35 Speaker 7: Why, thank you, Fred.

14:42 Speaker 3: Um, Dot? Is that it?

14:48 Speaker 4: Just do your magic.

14:50 Speaker 5: Okay.

14:52 Speaker 3: Here goes nothing.

14:55 Speaker 9: Are you prepared to meet your fate?

15:02 Speaker 3: Beware.

15:05 Speaker 8: Is that the best you can do?

15:07 Speaker 3: Oh, well, I wasn't really trying, but.

15:12 Speaker 8: Give it another go.

15:13 Speaker 3: Are you.

15:15 Speaker 9: Prepared to meet.

15:19 Speaker 3: No.

15:20 Speaker 2: No, no.

15:21 Speaker 8: Methinks that you could do better, Varlott.

15:24 Speaker 7: Wait a minute. What did you just call him?

15:28 Speaker 5: I think he said, Marlet.

15:30 Speaker 7: I know who that is.

15:32 Speaker 6: A friend of yours?

15:34 Speaker 10: Much more than a mere friend. I have finally been able to break the veil. And now, now, my dearest Millie, I have come for you. Does Millie know the spirit? Stan, Dot, and Fred look at her, a myriad of questions running through their minds. Perhaps the answers will present themselves in Act 3.

16:14 Speaker 1: If you're enjoying these stories, come over to our YouTube channel.

16:19 Speaker 3: Doorway to Nightmare.

16:23 Speaker 4: Where we add a few pics to color your imagination. See the faces behind the voices, too. Come on, you know you wanna.

16:45 Speaker 2: There have been many sightings and reports of ghosts, both good and bad. But as Mark Twain once said, everyone is a moon and has a dark side, which they never show to anybody.

17:03 Speaker 6: Millie, is there something you'd like to share with the rest of the class?

17:08 Speaker 4: Dorian?

17:09 Speaker 7: Dorian Michaels?

17:10 Speaker 8: The one and only.

17:14 Speaker 10: Ah, my sweet Millicent, how I long to hear my name emit from your lips.

17:21 Speaker 5: Who is Dorian Michaels?

17:23 Speaker 7: We went to college together.

17:25 Speaker 8: Such happy times.

17:28 Speaker 6: Exactly what happy times?

17:31 Speaker 7: This was long before I met you, Jack.

17:34 Speaker 8: We had such plans, Millicent.

17:37 Speaker 7: You had plans, Dorian? I told you that I didn't want anything to do with you.

17:42 Speaker 3: I knew.

17:44 Speaker 8: That you were only joking.

17:46 Speaker 3: I don't think she was joking.

17:49 Speaker 4: Quiet, Fred.

17:50 Speaker 7: Get it through your thick, whatever you call that, skullish blob, that I never wanted you.

17:59 Speaker 10: I waited at the little restaurant for you for over three hours.

18:05 Speaker 7: I told you I wasn't coming.

18:07 Speaker 10: You didn't lie, but now everything can be the way it was.

18:13 Speaker 6: I think I may have something to say in that.

18:19 Speaker 8: You dare defy me.

18:22 Speaker 5: Jack, I don't really think we should make it angry.

18:26 Speaker 3: No, Stan. That's exactly what we should do.

18:29 Speaker 4: I don't understand.

18:31 Speaker 9: Come on, you big blowhard. You're just a puff of useless smoke.

18:39 Speaker 5: Thank you, Fred. Really helpful.

18:42 Speaker 3: Fred, what are you doing? It's okay, Dorothy. The angrier he gets, the more energy he uses. Oh, I get it.

18:54 Speaker 4: You're just an ugly blob that wishes he were human so he can have his precious Millie back.

19:00 Speaker 3: Boo-hoo.

19:07 Speaker 7: My china!

19:09 Speaker 6: That's it. I've had enough. Will you shut up?

19:14 Speaker 2: How dare you?

19:16 Speaker 6: Oh, I not only dare, I'm telling you. Millie is my wife. Now leave, or so help me, you will never know what rest in peace means.

19:27 Speaker 8: Millicent, do you really feel that way as well?

19:31 Speaker 7: I told you back in college, Dorian.

19:34 Speaker 8: But where am I supposed to go?

19:38 Speaker 3: Well, I may have a solution to that.

19:42 Speaker 2: So who is.

19:45 Speaker 4: Or rather was. Dorian Michaels?

19:51 Speaker 7: We were in the same class together in college. He was always chasing me around the campus. I told him I wasn't interested, but he wouldn't take no for an answer.

20:03 Speaker 6: What happened to him?

20:05 Speaker 7: Remember a couple of years ago, Jack, at the class reunion? I found out Dorian was killed in an airplane crash shortly after graduation.

20:15 Speaker 4: Oh, how horrible.

20:16 Speaker 9: Well, that would explain the formless shadow. He didn't have a body to form in, so all he could manage was a shadow.

20:26 Speaker 6: Well, he's gone now, isn't he, Fred?

20:29 Speaker 3: Yep, he's gone.

20:30 Speaker 4: And we didn't even have to call control this time, thank goodness.

20:35 Speaker 7: I want to thank you, Fred, for your help. And you didn't need to hide from us.

20:41 Speaker 4: Kind of hard to explain a ghost in the house.

20:45 Speaker 5: By the way, Fred, where did you send Dorian?

20:48 Speaker 3: Oh, someplace to keep someone company.

20:54 Speaker 4: Fred, you didn't.

20:56 Speaker 3: It serves her right.

20:58 Speaker 6: Where did he go?

21:00 Speaker 5: I believe to the house where Fred's wife is. Right, Fred?

21:04 Speaker 3: You got it. I think they will make a wonderful couple.

21:11 Speaker 5: Isn't he in for a big surprise?

21:14 Speaker 4: Only if Dorian does as she says.

21:23 Speaker 2: Of course, now that the Carsons have met Fred... Jack is more apt to believe Millie whenever she says that she has seen a ghost. Well, most of the time. I'll be back shortly with a final word.

21:44 Speaker 4: Mystery. Horror. Thriller.

21:48 Speaker 8: Suspense.

22:10 Speaker 2: There are all kinds of ghost stories, from the terrifying to the comedic. As Samuel Beckett once said, we're all born straddling the grave. Our cast included William Stafford, Crimson McKenzie, Annie Mick, Dave Arkapov, Nick Davis, and Winslow Swan. The story was written by Crimson McKenzie and Winslow Swan, and the entire production was under the direction of Winslow Swan.

22:45 Speaker 2: And now, a preview of our next tale.

22:49 Speaker 5: Mr. Shepard, you have 30 days to vacate the property.

22:52 Speaker 6: But I've been here for over 60 years. My father was here before me. I learned the craft of making toys from him.

23:01 Speaker 5: I'm sorry, Mr. Shepard. There's absolutely nothing I can do.

23:05 Speaker 6: Where am I to go? What about the toys? What about the children?

23:09 Speaker 5: It's not my concern. The city council decided that this property will be demolished in 30 days, whether you are in it or not.

23:19 Speaker 2: This is your host, inviting you to return with us through the doorway to nightmare for another adventure into the world of your terrifying imaginations. Until next time, slumber peacefully. Epilogue. The butler did it.

23:49 Speaker 4: Hi, it's Crimson. We're hoping you're enjoying these stories and do you want to hear some more? Join us on our YouTube channel, Doorway to Nightmare, if you dare.